Friday, September 19, 2014

Glamcationing Online

Barry and I figured that if you go on a beach vacation in the middle of nowhere, you would normally be ok to, say, go outdoors. However, we noticed that several travellers could neither tolerate the terrifying skin-darkening sun, nor could they swim. With nothing else available, what did they do?
Well, mostly, it seems they posted pictures to say they were having a fabulous time. Apparently, while dining next to the ocean, you should have at least 2 devices to photograph your food, as shown above and below. Clearly, this view is not good enough to disconnect.
Barry and I, realizing we'd been vacationing wrong, decided to assimilate. This is as actually seen at neighbouring tables. Why enjoy your fakation when you can live life online?
That your online impressafriends see pictures of each meal is more important than enjoying said meal. So here is a picture of my banana.
The other very important thing to do is to take outdoor glamour shots. Here, you uncover from your full body sun cloak for 30 seconds in order to pretend you're having fun outdoors. (Actual fun is not relevant to your online glamour).
Above is another actual shot we saw, as is below. Unfortunately we were missing the recommended beach heels and dresses.
Barry got pretty good at glamcationing, but we quickly got bored.
So we went back to the water. Non-swimmers meant more reef for us.
It's harder to take selfies and to update your status underwater anyway.